Trial By Fire

The last two blog posts were about developing spirituality. Most people will experience these steps on their road to discovering who they really are and what they are really here for. That is if they care about those things and become aware of the big and small wake-up calls. Not all people do. In fact most do not. Many are busy just trying to get through each day and that is right where they need to be. No judgments for those who are not on this particular journey.


I wanted to talk about my experiences so far in relationship to developing my spirituality and how this has played out in my life. I was raised in a very religious, god fearing household and spent a lot of time doing religious things. I married and had two children like a good girl does and then realized that I had not looked much beyond this stage. I had always doubted myself and was extremely uncomfortable with the rules and regulations that religion had imposed on me, especially the male dominated hierarchy of things.

My “trial by fire” came when my children became teenagers and both suffered a major mental disorder. I was faced with truths, facts and ordeals that now seem to be straight out of science fiction. We all lived through what was, at the time, to be awful, heart wrenching and disastrous happenings. None of us came out the other side being the same people or embracing the ideals that we had followed going in. Nothing was the same. Everything had changed.

All of my beliefs were shaken loose and through a period of deep introspection and nearly ten years of counseling , learning and releasing I came out the other side. One important lesson I learned was that religion was not the same as spiritually. One is a system with dogma and one is total freedom to become more enlightened. What a blessing! My darkest hour was also my finest hour.